Choices

It seems that at several times in my life I am always faced with a sacrificial choice and it always involves people in my life, the effects of my life, and the eventual path that it would lead me to.

This time around I am faced with another life altering choice again. The last I made a such a choice it lead me near ruin and the end of something I really cherished. Now, I fucking have another choice again and the its another one of those BIG choices.

When is this ever going to end so that I can get some peace and quite?

I either choose a path of that would give me a very fruitful and stable career (and only that) or choose a path to a more fulfilled personal life but I would have to start my career life all over again from the bottom. Both have their drawback but not enought to elimate the choice down to one or another.

Well, people have said "Well, choose what will make you the happiest?" Easier said than done consider both could make me very, very happy.

This has been coming to head for the last few months and it doesn't help that is happening NOW in the middle of me doing things to prepare for one choice. Now of a sudden something LANDS right in front of me, giving me the other choice.

And it doesn't help that whatever choice I make will cause pain to someone regardless of which choice I make.

So yeah, welcome to life. This is what it means to live.

The best answer to that is "Oh, just fucking shove it."